The Great Escape

Last week I finally escaped Busan and returned home for good. I call it an escape not so much because I felt I had broken free from a confining situation, but more as a comment on the nature of my flight. More on that in a bit. Korea had become a little, nay a lot, tedious place to be for me over the last few months. Those little things I had enjoyed or endured with such good humor had become amplified in their aggravation. In any country where no one speaks your language(well?), even little everyday things are a little harder, a little more complicated.

Considering that my last few weeks involved a lot errands that required the closing down of accounts and cancellation of services, it was especially trying. So, I was overjoyed to see the tail of this airplane waiting for me at the gate in Narita airport in Tokyo. People say the Japanese are overly bureaucratic.. I might agree after experiencing this airport. I had to show my boarding pass 3 times and sign 2 clipboards just to get bused to my terminal. But more important is the story of how I barely got there in the first place.

This monstrosity is the result of two guitars, a roll of saran wrap and two rolls of duct tape. I had tried to get one of them shipped home but the cheapest and safest way was going to cost more than the guitar itself. So I hauled this green nightmare to the airport Sunday morning with nightmare visions of some airport official asking me to open it up to check something in it.

Bags checked without incident! I was down to to two carry on. The big one gave me trouble. I was pulled out of the line by an agent who told me that it wouldn't fit and I would have to check it. When she learned I had already checked two bags, she got ready to pull out the credit card charge slip. I wasn't having any of it. So, I went to the default position.. the one where I had been travelling for 10 years with this bag and had traveled with me on every major Asian airline without issue. And did she feel that the particular airline that she was representing have carry one baggage containment defiencies in comparison to every other major airline in Asia... she did not in fact feel that way.
Sunrise over the Pacific, as seen through the fog that permeates horizon at 10,000 feet and the numbed senses of a mind travelling against the time zone currents.

Touch down in Toronto some 23 hours after entombing the guitars in in a green coffin.

Good bye Asia, it's been fun and thanks for all the fish.

HK's last show...

Last Saturday was the Hermit King's last show in Busan. Kevin (drums), Mike (vox/acoustic), and myself (acupuncture needle mngt./eye candy) are all heading back home after this weekend. It was a real pleasure pretending to play guitar with these guys. We never had any drama, never trashed talked one another and genuinely enjoyed hanging out before and after the shows; at which time we never talked about our own music. It is totally rare to have 4.5 supremely talented musicians band together for almost a year with barely two egos to rub together.

This was Sunday morning at around 2am. We'd just been kicked off as the cops were threatening noise complaints. As you can see, I am the last to go. It should be noted that this was the only time I had ever broken a smile on stage.

Gino, Travis, Kevin, Mike, and T-bone. I have to go on record to say that we hadn't learned a new song since halloween (werewolves of London). It was not that we didn't feel the need to keep our show fresh, it's just that ESL teacher audiences tend to rotate themselves rather frequently. It was like we were a brand new band every other weekend.

This was our new year's show at Interplay. Nice stage it was, for some reason Kevin didn't make into the picture.

Oh wait...there he is

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eYX6AmBAg7M

Here are a few videos from Kevin's youtube of last Saturday's show.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Hm5XafodYQ

The Lemon Party

Last week I was going over some taste vocab with one of my elementary classes and describing the difference between bitter and sour. So, I asked them to make a face as if they were sucking on a lemon. They all became very excited and yelled out "Teacher! Oh, lemon is delicious." .... Ok then, challenge accepted.

So I made a deal with them. I told them that I would bring in a bag full of lemons for them to eat next week and that they would have to eat them all. If you're reading this, well... you'd have to be... you can imagine my perspective. Eating a bag of lemons sounds like the losing end of a bet.

"Lemon Party!!" they cried. We than made a deal that they would all have to eat a bag of lemons in return for them letting me take their pictures. Here are the results:

This is Robin, he took down at least 2 whole lemons without blinking.

Susan, she was really disappointed when we ran out.

Had to get that last drop. Where are the sour faces???

Helena was cool as ice, she seemed to eat lemons like that french fry kid from those Heinz commercials. She probably eats her oreos in three phases too.

There we go!

This is Han, he was one of the strongest advocates for the Lemon party.

Oh yeah, not so tough after all, are you?!?

Looks like I lost the bet.

The "Leaving Korea in 3 weeks" to do list

So, I have 3 weeks left in Korea before returning to Canada. Many things need to be done in order complete this chapter in my life. Some items on this list will require painful separation from treasured items and dear friends. Others will entail a concerted effort and close attention to detail in order to make sure that all loose ends are tied up, or down...

Here is my Leaving Korea to do list:

1) Reveal my secret identity in a text message to every number in my cell phone 2 minutes before I have service cut off.

2) Find a home for my plants

3) Be "real" with my students

4) Pack a suitcase full of soju and airplane kimchi

5) In the last 5 days I will take it upon myself to engage in a full dialogue with every single kid who yells "hello" at me and then turns away to giggle with their 20 friends who were leering on.

6) Be "unreal" with my students

7) Kick every car or scooter that cuts me off while crossing a crosswalk.

8) Start practicing how to say "excuse me" again, oh yeah, and re-learn how to eat silently with my mouth closed.

9) Give away the 300 business cards my company gave me.

10) Make my last day at work one that, despite countless hours of therapy, will never be forgotten by anyone who comes in contact with me.

1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,12

They're the kind of crew that makes me wonder, "Was I that big of a goofball when I was in the 5th grade?", to which I get the immediate response "You were worse". Yep, that's my Tuesday and Thursday Bridge level class. 6 hours a week with them. They alternately drive me nuts and leave me completely cracked up.

I think I learned a valuable lesson from this class, for this is the first group of students in front of whom I completely lost my marbles. Enraged! Anger pouring out into a litany, a mindless lecture within which every alternate word was holding back an F-bomb (or the word "fuck" for those of you out of the "know"). Afterwards, I think we all felt genuine regret, I had a sit down with them, very solemnly talking about why I had gotten so angry and how it made me feel bad to yell. We came to some kind of agreement to avoid that in the future. Lesson learned! Don't say fuck in front of your students!

Anyway, this class is really funny to teach. They usually come up with some kind of priceless line or song or dance every hour. I'll miss'em!